Your Next Move
Each life is punctuated by events that seem to change everything: graduations, moves, medical diagnoses, new jobs, layoffs, and of course “Hatch ‘em, match ‘em, and dispatch ‘em” (births, marriages, and deaths).
These threshold moments can be terrifying, making us feel like we’re standing on a precipice or plunging into freefall. Or they can inspire visions of new freedoms and new opportunities, gateways to worlds previously out of reach. And remember, India’s loveable Ganesh awaits at the doorway to ease you forward.
Even the change of season subtly urges us to move on. In Spring, prompted by longer days and warmer temps, we come out of our shells to explore the world around us. We may get more active in sports, spring cleaning, or waking up the garden, stirred by the sense that things are in motion all around us. I took my first dive into the ocean Sunday to jumpstart the coming of “high season” in the Hamptons
This winter, with the passing of my beloved mom, I confronted a less welcome threshold. Way too old to be an orphan, with the loss of my second parent I nonetheless feel like the floor has dropped away from beneath me or I’m standing on a vast open field. Metaphors fail, but an abiding sense of emptiness pervades: a void, an absence. Something crucial is missing. On the physical plane, it’s the loss of my parents’ house, where our small family gathered for holidays and birthdays, where my mom reminded us that we belong together, and where I also found rest and respite from my busy independent life. Then there’s the shifting nature of sibling relationships, as my sister, brother, and I grapple with how to stay connected.
For years I joked with my parents that I would never grow up. Having bypassed the conventional markers of marriage, homeownership, children, and job, I have maintained my childhood playfulness and curiosity, as well as a sometimes delusional trust that life will go on forever and there will be time for all the things I still want to do.
But experiencing my parents’ mortality has reminded me that I won’t be around forever either. Many of my friends seem focused on winding down: retiring, downsizing, relocating to warmer climes. I’m not there yet. Which is in many ways a good thing! I’ve been fortunate to turn what I love into what I “do,” how I support myself. Yoga, writing, and art are more than jobs or passions—they are who I am. So I won’t be retiring anytime soon, if ever! But I’m now more conscious that my time is finite and valuable.
Are you at a threshold? Or see one coming? I encourage you to view any gateway as opening up new worlds. Rather than lapsing into fear and limiting your options, why not ask: “What now? What can happen now that couldn’t before and won’t be possible again?” How can you seize this moment? For, as a wise friend used to remind me, “Today is the day!”—very possibly your one and only.
“Bucket lists” have become our shorthand for all the things we’d like to do. But that means they’re also the things that for whatever reasons we haven’t done—yet. Ask yourself, “Why?” What’s been holding you back? What’s blocking your desires and your dreams? Are you overthinking? Endlessly troubleshooting before the trouble starts? Waiting for the perfect moment? Waiting for the kids to graduate, work to slow down, your aging parents to die? There are always reasons not to follow your heart, but just as many to do so. In the end, what kind of life do you want to have lived? What would you do right now if you were free of fear?
My call to action—to all of you and to myself!—and courtesy of Nike: Just do it!
READY, SET, GO!
SUMMER CLASSES
YOGA IN THE VINES
Sundays 10:15-11:15
Wolffer Vineyard
Sagaponack NY
Kick off summer Memorial Day weekend with my yoga class at Wolffer Vineyard, breathing and moving amid the rows of budding vines.
SUMMER CLASSES
Fridays 1:00-2:00
East Hampton Senior Center
WELLNESS 60+ Chair Yoga
Over 60? Join me for these free classes! I promise a good workout—you’d be surprised what you can do on and around a chair!
LOIS ON TV
PRIVATE LESSONS
The best way to start or grow your yoga, private lessons ensure that the most benefit from your time on the mat—as well as tips on how to move throughout the day! Beginning in June, I will be offering custom yoga (your place or mine!) seven days/week in the Hamptons.
See you all in your bright new lives!
Lois Nesbitt
www.loisnesbittyoga.com
loisnesbitt1@gmail.com
(917)975-8009